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Whether you are a student or a seasoned professional, you likely have a skill. Not just a skill, but an area of expertise that you can help teach others.
When we have imposter syndrome, we don’t acknowledge these areas. We can receive compliments and plaudits but we will always try to downplay them. Â
Phrases like “It’s not that big a deal,” or “Anyone could do it” might be common phrases for someone who is struggling with imposter syndrome.
Imposter syndrome doesn’t affect every area of our lives. You may be very confident at work, but then display imposter syndrome in your relationship. Maybe your imposter syndrome manifests in one of your hobbies, or at school.
In this podcast Michel shares two specific habits of people with imposter syndrome. See where these habits might be showing up in your life. Identify them, and follow our guidelines for fixing them.We all have an area where it shows up. You are not alone in that regard. But, we can all take steps to shut it out and starve the imposter of the oxygen it needs to live.
Please go to UpSkillCommunity.com to review show notes and join a community of leaders investing in better understanding themselves so they can address the imposter syndrome in their work and lives.What are you good at? What are you most skilled at doing? What is your area of expertise? If you’re asked to speak on a panel, which topic should you be asked to share on whose company should you be in? What should people know you. As an expert in. Why should people come to you? What areas should people come to you to discuss? What is your strength? What are you really, really good at? What are you the very best at. Feeling uncomfortable with these questions. You’re not alone. If you experienced imposter syndrome. Or any of the characteristics that define imposter syndrome, you may feel uncomfortable with one or more than one of the questions I asked earlier. In episode 41, I clarified what imposter syndrome is and shared a story that highlights how it’s experienced. In the previous episode, I further shared three characteristics that can help us identify when imposter syndrome is creeping into our lives so that we can address it before it spreads. In this episode, I’m going to share what it sounds like when it shows up at work and in our relationships.
Michel Shah:Â
Welcome to UpSkill Talks brought to you by McGraw Hill. I’m your host, Michel Shah lead UpSkiller at UpSkill Community. UpSkill Talks is a podcast for leaders, leaders who are actively seeking innovative and creative ways to interact lead themselves and others. In every episode, through real life stories and enlightening conversations, we will explore the challenge. And opportunities real leaders face in today’s everchanging workplace. We will present you with real strategies for you to leverage your soft skills and produce transformative results. Thank you for joining me on this journey. Let us begin.
In my research on imposter syndrome, I found a joke that made me really laugh. I’ll share it with you. It says a company. Was looking for a keynote speaker for their first ever imposture syndrome conference. And it was a nightmare, finding a speaker, every speaker they reached out to. Sad. They didn’t deserve to be there. Now isn’t that the classic imposter syndrome. This really highlights how imposter syndrome. Doesn’t just affect the individual, but harms us all because we are not able to have access to the skills and abilities of these high achievers because they don’t believe they actually. Have the skills. That we detect that we experience. And so we need to invest in identifying imposter syndrome, wherever it shows up, and we need to be willing to do the work, to minimize it in fact, to eradicate it where possible. But first. Let’s figure out how we identify it in order that we can work on addressing it. Here are two important characteristics that will help you identify imposter syndrome. Wherever it shows up in your life. Number one. Discounting praise. You’ve done a great job. Someone provides you a compliment, recognizes you for it, showcases you for it. Find some way to reward you for it. And you cannot accept this recognition. Here’s what that may sound like. Come on. You’re exaggerating. You’ll give me too much credit. And new one could do this. I didn’t do anything so special. I’m just the little guy come on. Come on. When you hear that? You are hearing a classic. Imposture syndrome script the goal of identifying these characteristics is so that we can move ourselves forward. So it’s not for you to take a hard cold look at this and go, well, sometimes I do it and sometimes I don’t it’s to recognize that there are times that I’m uncomfortable accepting recognition, accepting praise, accepting compliments. It does happen to me sometimes. And that puts you in. Enormous company. Most of us have that feeling sometimes. Once you identify that you do do it sometimes. Can you identify the cases in which you do it? In what situations are you likely to deny, to reject, to feel uncomfortable with the recognition? This is going to give you a clue to where the imposture has placed itself into your life. And then you can begin to peel apart and learn a little bit more. Dig a little bit deeper to better understand how does it come to be that the imposture is in this place? Why am I experiencing these feelings in this place? Because I’m not experiencing them necessarily here or there or so. Could it be that you are experiencing the imposture at work, but not at home, not in your social life, not out in your community activities. Could it be that you are not seeing this at work, but. In your role as a parent, your experience in it. Discounting praise is a very popular characteristic off imposture syndrome. Almost one of the baselines, very easy to spot. And so we are able to pick this one up very readily if it exists in our lives and the extent to which it exists in our lives, because there are levels to how we experience this. The second one is Denine your competence, and certainly very related to discounting the price is denying your competence. Someone calls in on you. As in the case of Paul in episode 41, where he was asked to mentor and share strategies for presentation, since he was a master at giving presentations. So first Paul is rejecting the praise. He’s not accepting the compliments because he does not actually believe. His presentations are as good as others are telling him. Secondly, he certainly doesn’t believe he’s as competent as they are letting on because he doesn’t believe he has those skills to be able to share. He believes this happened in by luck. And so he doesn’t have anything tangible to share. And so first he’s discounting the praise and coming down one more level. He’s denying his competence completely. Now. Let’s take a look at ourselves. Let’s hold up. Our Miro. And the question is not. Do you deny your competence? The question is in what areas do you deny your competence? Think about that area. It doesn’t mean you do it all the time. In what situations do you deny it under? What conditions do you deny it? What is that spare that you find yourself denying your competence in for me, it’s in the kitchen. It’s cooking. I’m not going to admit that I can do anything worthwhile in the kitchen. That’s where the imposter shows up for me. I will quickly hand over the kitchen to anyone who says I can cook without any regard for my competence in the kitchen. Where does that show up for you? It’s at showing up at work. Is that showing up when it’s time to give a presentation, is it showing up when it’s time to lead a project? Is it showing up when it’s time to showcase any important skill that you have to mentor or to be mentored? When is it showing up for you? Is it showing up when it’s time to take a risk, to start a business, to. Share a thought, does it show up when it’s time to share your thoughts on social media that you’re thinking. I don’t have enough expertise and skill like these other people on here for me to be sharing my thoughts, like who would want to hear my thoughts? If you’re feeling that way, the imposture is in the place. We’ve got to find it. And get it out of here. So you want to identify this, whether it’s happening at home in the kitchen, like me, or it’s happening at work on social media or in your community. It’s very important for us to identify that this is happening. That’s the starting point. Even if you do nothing further. If all you achieve after listening to this is identifying that this is an area for me, where the imposter shows up. i’m going to go forward and think about how it comes to be if this all you achieve you’re moving forward when the imposter shows up in the area of your competence and someone regard to you highly, you may begin to say things like. Anyone could do this. I got lucky. It’s just grace. It’s just because something. Outside of your control happened and you got a break. Something happened, something made this happen for you. You never give yourself credit for the effort, the energy, the investment that you make in your work in your project or whatever it is that you’re doing. Yet. I am willing to bet you are very likely the first person. To congratulate someone to recognize their efforts. To reward them to support them, to celebrate them to recognize someone for their work, their contributions. Why aren’t you being gracious to yourself? Why aren’t you being kind to yourself? Why can’t you turn around and give that person in the mirror? The recognition. The acknowledgement. The credit that you deserve. And that’s what I want you to start practicing. Once a day, think about one thing. That you deserve credit for, for your full day of effort for waking up? For going through the day for delivering on commitments for supporting others. What’s one thing. That you can give yourself credit for at the end of a day. When you begin to recognize your own value added. Your own contributions. Your own credit, worthiness your own competence. You begin to acknowledge it to yourself. It will be easier for you to acknowledge it and accept it coming from others. And you will starve off the imposter syndrome. Squeeze it out. Suck the air out of it by giving yourself credit. The credit you deserve for what you get up and go to. Starve out that imposture don’t let the imposter take away. The credit for the efforts, the work, your ideas, your contribution that belongs to you own it. It’s for you and only you. Should enjoy the feeling. Of gratitude of accomplishment of pleasure. That comes from it. The pleasure the joy the happiness is yours starve off the imposture
Michel Shah:Â
Thank you for listening to this episode of UpSkill Talks brought to you by McGraw Hill. We bring you new episodes every Monday. Please take a moment to subscribe, leave a five star rating and a written review at apple podcast. Or follow us on. By Google podcast or wherever you listen to your favorite podcasts, don’t forget to share UpSkill talks with other leaders like yourself. So they too may gain the skills and insights to produce amazing results. Please go to UpSkillCommunity.com to review show notes and learn how you can join a community of leaders from across the globe. Collaborating to lead in a more meaningful and impactful way. I’m your host, Michel Shah. And again, thank you for joining me on this episode of UpSkill Talks.
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